Tabernacle United Methodist Church welcomes new support group for parents of children battling addiction
By Krista Cerminaro
Tabernacle United Methodist Church has created a support group for parents who have children facing the struggles of addiction. The first meeting will be held on Monday, Feb. 26, at 7:30 p.m. at the church, which is located at 166 Carranza Road.
Support for Parents of Addicted Children was implemented by Andrea Frake, a member of the church, with the help of the Rev. Kyle Cuperwich.
The idea of it is to create a safe “space” where people feel “comfortable talking about uncomfortable things,” Frake explained.
“It’s a meeting that’s open to all people — all faiths, no faith,” said Cuperwich, who has been a pastor at the church since July.
Cuperwich, who has worked with AA groups in the past, and Frake, who is also a nurse practitioner, both hope the group will attract Tabernacle community members, as well as members of surrounding communities, who need the support — particularly because there aren’t many groups such as this one in the area, according to Frake.
“In my previous experience with AA, with groups such as this, I served a very small town — a thousand people. There were more people at that AA meeting on Tuesday nights than there were in church on Sunday,” Cuperwich said.
“I felt there was a big community need — this is obviously an epidemic issue, and although I’ve been to groups myself, I didn’t feel that there was enough specifically for parents,” said Frake, who’s been a member at the church for about 12 years. “Parents come from a different viewpoint. Whether their child’s 17, 20, 50 — doesn’t mean anything. They’re still your child.” Frake noted that aside from two similar groups in Marlton and Hamilton, there isn’t much else out there for parental support in comparison to how many people the disease affects.
According to the statewide substance abuse overview on www.nj.gov, there were 3,090 substance abuse treatment admissions among Burlington County residents in 2016, with heroin being the leading primary drug at 1,319, followed by alcohol, at 903.
“This crosses all ethnic groups, all socioeconomic groups, all ages,” Frake said. “This is not a discriminatory illness.”
Cuperwich said when Frake presented the idea to him, he was immediately on board to help spread the word.
“I’m game, because it’s awesome when you see lives change,” Cuperwich said. “That’s what the church is supposed to do — it’s supposed to help people change their lives, receive new life, and this is one way we’re doing it.”
Frake’s idea to start the program stemmed both from her personal experience having family members affected, and from seeing a tremendous need in the community.
“Nurses sometimes are a forefront of these things. They see the parental anguish when their son or daughter comes in with complications of this illness. It’s devastating,” Frake said.
“No matter what age your kid is, they’re going to want to provide guidance. But, they need it in themselves first. They can’t help anybody without helping themselves,” Frake continued. “It’s the whole oxygen-airplane thing. Same principal. You put on your oxygen — then you help the other person.”
Frake explained the goal of the group is not only to provide emotional support and guidance, but to provide the necessary information as well. Frake wants to incorporate guest speakers every few meetings, who can provide families with that information.
“People are starving for good information about the illness itself — what can you do to help your child move through the illness? What you can expect from the illness yourself in watching it? Where is there help?” Frake said. “There’s everything from legal barriers, to health-care barriers, health insurance barriers, monetary barriers — so parents, their heads [are] spinning, and they don’t even know which way to go.”
Cuperwich also added people are just recently starting to accept that addiction is an illness, rather than a choice.
“It used to be a moral failing, and I’ll admit that the church has helped put that stigma in people’s minds, that it is a moral failing,” Cuperwich said. “But it’s not. It’s an illness,”
The meetings, which will be held on the fourth Monday of the month, will give all parents the opportunity to speak and share their personal experience, although they don’t have to. Frake said she wants to provide them with the opportunity to speak privately, if they prefer.
Additionally, attendees will enter the church through the back, and all information will be kept confidential.
“We just want to make sure everybody knows, everybody’s welcome,” Frake said.
